


Vocaloid: Attracted to You Like a Magnet

by When_The_Cicadas_Die



Series: Hidden In The Dark [1]
Category: Vocaloid
Genre: Based on a Vocaloid Song, M/M, One Shot, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-11
Updated: 2018-03-11
Packaged: 2019-03-29 23:28:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13937724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/When_The_Cicadas_Die/pseuds/When_The_Cicadas_Die
Summary: On the night of his first anniversary, Kaito Shion expected it to be an unforgettable, memorable event. This turns out to be true, but not in the way he was expecting. When he wakes up the next morning, he finds himself in bed - though to his surprise, this bed isn't familiar at all. He's reintroduced to the charming Gakupo Kamui, and Kaito realises he's messed everything up once again. Will he tell his girlfriend the truth of what happened that night, or will he keep it hidden in hopes she'll never find out?





	Vocaloid: Attracted to You Like a Magnet

  I find myself waking up with a sharp, throbbing pain in my head. I grit my teeth together, my eyelids weakly fluttering open. The sunlight spills through a crack in the curtains, and this only makes my strange headache worse. I let out a sort of hiss and roll over onto my side – when I do so, I’m greeted by the sight of something I didn’t expect at all.

  “Holy-!” I sharply gasp, finding myself now lying awfully close to some stranger. I pull my face away from his after screaming right at him, and in the process, I almost fall out of bed. Bed… “Shit, this bed isn’t mine!” How did I not notice as soon as I woke up? Where the hell am I? Who the hell is this person next to me?

  With all the commotion I’m making, it’s no surprise the stranger is soon awake. He grunts lightly, as if he’s been disturbed from a deep, peaceful sleep. He slowly pulls his eyes open, and to my surprise, he doesn’t freak out like I just did. Instead, a light smile graces his features. “Hmm, so you’re awake before I am. Couldn’t get last night out of your mind?”

  I begin to sweat as I hear those words. “La-…la…last night?” I can barely get my words out. I just sort of wheeze those words, in a state of shock. My mind has gone completely blank – is he implying we did something last night? Is he implying we- “No, no! No way, don’t fuck with me! I have a girlfriend, and…!”

  I find that my words have been cut off, hardly even realising at first. But then, it becomes clear very quickly that this stranger has yanked me close to him once more, and his lips are on top of mine. My eyes grow wide at this sensation. Just before I pull away to yell in protest, I begin to regain a sense of familiarity. _That’s right. Last night, I…_

The male pulls his lips from mine after a few seconds, before shuffling backwards with a grin. “You were rambling. I had to calm you down somehow… Anyway, did that bring anything back?”

  As a matter of fact, yes. I feel like I’m going to be sick. I must have been black-out drunk last night if I completely forgot for a while. And to even end up in a stranger’s bed… Oh, God. “What… what the hell happened last night?”

  “I should be the one asking you,” he responds, with a light chuckle. “You were all over me. How could I resist the advances of someone so eager and adorable?”

  I feel myself almost choking on air at his casual words. I was all over him? What! There’s no way that’s true. I’m not that type of guy, damn it. I have respect, and morals, and I-… Shit, I was black-out drunk. I stare off into the distance for a while, trying to process everything so far, and even remember at least some of last night.

  “You don’t… regret it, right, Kaito-kun?” His voice snaps me out of thought. I trail my eyes back to his face, to see that he appears to be sort of worried. What kind of question is that? “If you’re worried about your girlfriend, you don’t need to be… I won’t tell anyone.”

  I gulp lightly, immediately thinking of my girlfriend. Miku. We’ve always been viewed as the perfect couple, so for me to do something like this… Fuck, I’ve fucked it all up. I’m trying so hard to be rational, but the moment he pressed his lips to mine earlier… It felt familiar and warm – like we somehow formed a deep bond over the period of one single night. It felt like a kiss from a lover I’ve known for years. This is so wrong.

  “Kaito-kun…”

  I narrow my eyes, lightly shaking my head. “I don’t even remember your name.”

  The male grins at this. “Gakupo. I guess you were a bit more out of it than I was,” he awkwardly chuckles. “You really don’t remember anything?”

  “Barely. And my head is killing,” I sigh, exasperated.

  “Well, maybe I could… remind you…”

  My eyes grow wide as I feel Gakupo trail his hand down to rest on my hip. A light, shaky breath escapes my lips as he slowly traces his fingertips across my skin under the blankets; a surprised gasp following shortly after he doesn’t hesitate at all to take hold of my member. “Ga-Gaku…po…”

  I squeeze my eyes shut as he wraps his palm around my member, before he slowly rubs me up and down. This is so wrong. Why is it, with each stroke, I find myself growing more and more excited in anticipation? Part of me wants this. But I need to be rational… “Nnngh…ah…!” I can’t suppress those moans any longer. My cheeks are burning from the sheer embarrassment.

  Gakupo is quick to push me onto my back, after both of us lying on our sides. He moves on top of me straight after, straddling me. “Are you… getting the picture now…?” he whispers to me, leaning close to my lips again. That low, seductive tone sends a light shiver down my spine.

  “Gakupo, I…” I can’t find anything else to say. I want to protest. But I can’t… It feels incredibly amazing, even with just a few tugs of my excitement. It’s like he knows exactly how to please me. I guess this is what we must have done last night.

  “Since you were all over me last night, I feel…obligated…to return the favour.” He slips his hand down my boxers again, this time taking hold of my hardening member almost straight away. As he gives me slow, teasing tugs, he leans closer and presses his soft lips to mine before I have the chance to protest.

  And with that, my mind goes blank again…

**…**

  I stand at the doorway of Gakupo’s house, my cheeks still stained a bright red from that _absolutely_ unforgettable experience we shared just now. I stare down to my feet, unable to say a single word as I stand opposite him. ‘ _Does this mean I’m technically not a virgin anymore…? I had no idea something so big could… could… Wah…!’_

Gakupo lets out a quiet laugh, breaking the silence. “That was fun, right?” he brightly grins, as if we just played a game or something. He lets out a long sigh after that, seeming to be more serious now. I slowly look up at him, connecting our eyes. “Call me stupid, but… I’d really like to see you again. I never thought I’d meet someone so special from a one-night stand… I guess you’ve got me hooked.” He rubs nervously at the back of his neck.

  He just put my feelings into words. Special… That’s the bond I can feel with him. My heart is pounding hard in my chest. I have no idea why such emotions have been invoked within me. I have no idea what to do. “I don’t know, Gakupo. I feel the same way as you, but my girlfriend… I don’t know what to do.”

  “Well, it’s a crazy idea. But what if…she didn’t find out?” Gakupo sheepishly suggests.

  I blink blankly at that suggestion. Yeah, that’s crazy. Suggesting that I pretty much do this behind my girlfriend’s back… Shit, I’m already in too deep, aren’t I? The feelings I have for him at this point are undeniable. I can’t avoid it forever. Even so, I need time to think. “I’ll just… call you later. My head’s a mess.”

  Gakupo gives a nod at this. Just before silence fell between us when we came to the doorway, we ended up exchanging phone numbers. “I understand if you don’t want to come back for… well…” He laughs awkwardly, referring quite obviously to sex. “But, y’know, you’d at least make a good friend.”

  He really does want me, doesn’t he? I feel so bad… Why did this have to happen, damn it? I let out a quiet sigh, deciding to part ways with him for now. “Well, I’ll… see you.” I give him a small wave, before turning on my heels and quickly heading out the open front door. I don’t wait for a response, feeling far too guilty.

   I head down the path and move away from his house at a quick pace. I stare to the road ahead, narrowing my eyes to see if I know the area. “Mm…” I mutter, darting my eyes around for a couple of moments. Then, I finally recognise parts of the area. There’s a bus-stop not too far down the road, so I can at least get the hell away from here easily.

  Once I set myself down at the bus-stop, I reach into my pocket and retrieve my phone. I make a check of the time, and see that it’s a few minutes after 11am. I let out a deep sigh of relief, thankful that I can try to have a full normal day and forget everything. I see that there are a few texts on my phone from my girlfriend Miku.

  I gulp, feeling the weight of my guilt pressing down onto my chest. I open the texts up and skim through them. I’m usually so happy when Miku texts me – I’m always excited to make plans with her. But now that I’m skimming through her words in such a half-assed manner… I groan quietly, reading her texts quickly. She wants to meet up at our most frequent date spot; some Café in town.

  I have to push Gakupo out of my mind. I need to at least act like I still want to be with Miku. Now that I think about it, it’d be a lot harder than I thought to keep everything secret. Conveniently enough, my older sister Kaiko works at the Café where Miku and I visit. She loves Miku as if she was a younger sister. She has high hopes for the both of us and our future, since this is my first serious girlfriend. Basically, I have to think about this decision a lot.

  Before I know it, I’m sitting in that Café with my girlfriend, at a table with a nice view out the window. We’ve just set ourselves down, and she’s smiling sweetly at me like she always does. She always has that look of love and appreciation in her sparkling blue eyes. I can’t break her heart.

  “Happy first day of our first year together anniversary!” Miku beams, a giggle escaping her lips as she says those words, as enthusiastic as ever. She’s a little childish, but that’s part of the reason I fell in love with her. She’s so carefree, and loving, and amazing… Yesterday was our first anniversary. We spent some time out together, but she ran into a friend… The rest is fuzzy after that. But that’s why I feel so crappy.

  “Heh…” I softly laugh, appreciating her soothing smile for a little longer. “Happy first day of our first anniversary together, indeed.” I reach across the table to take hold of her hand. Perhaps it just wasn’t meant to be, Miku. I’m so sorry.

  “Hehe, you’re so sweet!” Miku says, lightly squeezing my hand. “So, did you do anything fun when you got home last night? Or did you just go straight to sleep?”

  Anything fun…? I try to regain the colour in my face. Poor choice of words, Miku. I nonchalantly shake my head, letting out a sort of shaky laugh. “Nope, I just crashed.”

  “Oh… I couldn’t get you out of my mind…” A cheeky smirk pulls at her lips, and I’m shocked to see this much confidence from Miku regarding inappropriate thoughts. I mean, considering we’re still virgins. Uh… Well, I _was_ until earlier. But still, this isn’t like her. I hope she doesn’t feel ready to take that next step yet. I simply can’t do that now.

  “Uh, sh-shall we order something?” I quickly change the subject, acting like her words embarrassed me. In reality, I just can’t face that subject without being reminded of Gakupo. Miku just blinks at me in confusion, before giving a shrug and agreeing with ordering.

  Within a couple of moments, I can see my older sister hurrying towards our table from the other side of the Café. I raise a brow at her excessive behaviour. Strangely enough, I don’t feel like dealing with all this happiness today. Kaiko stops at our table, smiling widely right at us. “Morning, Kaiko-oneechan…”

  “Ooooh, I knew you’d be here today of all days, Otouto-chan!” she suddenly squeals. Despite her being a whole four years older than me – twenty-two, to be precise – she still acts like a kid. I mean, seriously? Otouto-chan? She always ends up attracting a crowd with that behaviour. “And hello to you, Miku-tan!”

  I try not to groan in frustration too audibly. “Oneechan, if you don’t mind, can we order?” Again, I try not to let out such an impatient tone, but it must have slipped a little bit.

  Kaiko and Miku exchange momentary glances, before they both nod. “Alrighty, Otouto-chan, what’re you having today?” She whips out a small notepad and pen from her breast-pocket. We begin to make our orders, and the entire time, it feels as though I’m not really there. I can’t shut my mind up.

  I spend most of the time absent-mindedly sipping my hot chocolate, while just staring out of the window. I can hear Miku talking to me, but I can’t make out a single word. I’m just mumbling ‘yes’ and ‘no’ as she goes, and surprisingly, my ignorance isn’t caught. Once we’ve finished up at the Café, Miku asks me if I’ll come to the library with her.

  I snap out of thought, though I’m still in a bit of a daze. Not to mention that hot chocolate certainly didn’t help the throbbing pain in my head. However, I agree to go along with Miku – a library will be the perfect place to relax in silence. “Sure, the library sounds great.”

**…**

  As we step through the library doors, I take in a deep breath, in awe of the silence in here. It doesn’t seem to be so busy at this time, which is perfect. I can feel my headache starting to subside a little bit already – amazing! I regain a smile, feeling less cranky than before. Miku and I make our way over to the section she loves the most… Manga.

  I’m not too into manga myself, but Miku has always had a soft spot for it. I noticed that her favourite genre is magical girls. It’s so typical of her. Man… this really is difficult. I know practically everything about Miku. We’ve been so happy together – we’ve never even had a proper fight before. This is why it’s so hard to come to a decision.

  I draw in a light breath. Relax… I have plenty of time to think about this. I mean, it’s not as though we’re going to bump into Gakupo while we’re at the library, right? Haha, that’d be such a ridiculous coincidence. I set myself down at a soft chair near the manga section. I usually just sit back and relax while Miku takes her time to pick out the manga she wants.

  The silence in the area does wonders for my sore head. I should have grabbed some water earlier, instead of a hot chocolate, but it’s not like I could think straight earlier. But at least the library is nice and cool, and quiet. I pull myself to my feet, deciding I should probably grab a book while I wait. But just as I turn to move to another section, I can hear a loud screech of excitement coming from the manga section.

  “Uwah! Luka-chaaan!”

  “Oh! Mi-chan!”

  “Eh…?” I quietly mumble, raising a brow. It seems as though Miku’s bumped into someone she knows. But I wonder who, exactly. I don’t really remember the name Luka. Curious, I head towards where Miku is, rather than grabbing a book for myself. When I step into the section, I see a pink-haired older female standing close to Miku.

  “Ah- Kaito-kun! I was just about to call for you. You remember me mentioning Luka-chan, right?” Miku grins, looking expectantly at me. I dart my glance between the unfamiliar female and my girlfriend, gulping lightly.

  “Hold that thought, Mi-chan. Oi, Gaku-kun, come over here already, would ya!” Luka shouts over her shoulder, and I immediately feel myself grow weak when she utters that name.

  “Coming, coming…~” A tired voice answers, and within a couple of moments, an all too familiar face emerges from presumably the next section over. I try to gulp, but my mouth has gone dry. I instinctively grip onto my girlfriend’s hand, giving a weak smile to her.

  “Took you long enough,” Luka huffs, rolling her eyes.

  For a split second, he and I make eye contact. I literally _just_ thought about how much of a ridiculous coincidence this would be. That single second feels like it lasts an eternity… and I’m immediately reminded of our previous encounters. I quickly pull my eyes from his, trying my hardest not to show a visible blush.

  “Sorry,” Gakupo chuckles, regaining his composure as soon as I break eye contact. He acts as though we’ve never met. I watch as he slides an arm around this Luka’s waist, and as he places a kiss on her cheek.

  I bite down on my lower lip, feeling sick to my stomach all of a sudden. Are they…? Fuck, this is too much. Why the hell did he keep _her_ a secret from me, when I was so honest? “Uhm… Luka-chan, is it?” I’m quick to move the conversation forward, looking to the pink-haired female. Why is it I feel angry at her…?

  “Yes, yes! That’s me,” she happily nods, smiling brightly. She wraps an arm around Gakupo’s shoulders, and uses her free hand to grip his. “And this is my lazy, yet wonderful boyfriend.”

  “Wooow, I’m so jealous of how close you two are…!” Miku gasps in awe, her eyes lighting up at their casual contact in public. She teasingly pouts up at me. “Kaito-kun, why can’t we be like that in public?~”

  I sort of stare blankly, unable to process what’s happening. I can barely hear Miku talking. “…Huh?” Once I snap out of shock, I see that both girls are looking at me with confused expressions. I don’t dare to look at Gakupo’s reaction, however. I’m going to end up ruining everything for him if I don’t pull myself together, damn it.

  “Kaito-kun?” Miku speaks, resting a hand on my shoulder.

  “Sorry, just a bit tired,” I respond, giving her the most confident smile I can muster. I turn to face her, my smile softening as I speak sincerely to her. I truly mean these words, but I’m not sure how much longer I can go on hurting her. “Anyway, I want you to feel special when I give you affection, Mi-chan. That’s why I don’t want anyone else but you to see.”

  “K-Kaito-kun…” Miku whispers, a light blush staining her innocent cheeks.

  “Wah! Mi-chan, you’re so lucky, too!” Luka exclaims suddenly, and when I look at her, she’s looking at us in awe as well.

  “It certainly is admirable,” Gakupo adds, in an agreeing tone. I can’t help but trail my eyes up to look at his face. His expression is pretty much blank; unreadable. I wonder what he’s thinking right now…

  “How long have you been with Gaku-kun, Luka-chan? I bet it’s been like, forever,” Miku pipes up, curiously.

  “A day with this one feels like it lasts forever. Especially when she goes into a clothes store…” Gakupo remarks, smirking at his girlfriend.

  “Hey…!” Luka whines, a pout pulling at her lips. “Hmph… I’ve been with this big idiot for three years. Hard to believe, huh?”

  I take in a deep breath. Three years… I’d be responsible for ruining three years of a relationship if I selfishly chose to return to him. I don’t understand, though. Why would he let me ‘jump on him’ – as he so casually put it – if he was in a serious relationship?

  “Oh, that really is a long time. I hope we last that long, Kaito-kun!” Miku squeezes my hand tighter, and I can _feel_ the weight of the guilt on my chest crushing me even harder.

  “Well, we’ve been doing good for a year,” I respond, with a light laugh.

  “Ah, I have an idea!” Luka suddenly lights up, looking to Miku and I. “It’s been far too long since we last caught up, Mi-chan. How would everyone like to come to my house for lunch? Mi-chan and I can catch up, and you two boys can get to know each other.”

  I avert my glance as subtly as possible, fighting the embarrassment I feel from those words. Trust me Luka, I know your boyfriend possibly even better than you do. “Uh, y-yeah… That sounds great.”

  “You know I couldn’t say no, babe,” Gakupo grins at Luka.

  Oh, great. This is just great. Nothing like spending some quality time with my girlfriend, my one-night stand, and his girlfriend. Why on earth did I have to get myself into this situation? I should really learn how to turn people down gently.

**…**

  As expected, being at Luka’s house with the others is already extremely awkward and too much to handle. I’ve been in this unfamiliar house for a total of five minutes, and I don’t think it’s possible for my heart to race much faster without fainting. I’m just terrified of ruining everything – after learning Gakupo has a long-term girlfriend, I can feel so much pressure. I have to act normal. Just act normal.

  Luka guides us through to the kitchen; it’s a small but quaint little area in her house. I can tell she takes pride in her kitchen the most, as she’s currently showing off every little part of it to Miku. I can’t seem to find any time to myself, just to take a break from this all.

  “Luka-chan, your kitchen is lovely and all, but… well… geez, I’m dying to use the bathroom-!” That’s so typical of Miku… and rather convenient, now that I think about it. “Can you show me where it is?”

  “Sure! While I show you, I can also show you my bedroom!” Luka replies, beaming at Miku.

  “Right- But bathroom first, okay?” Miku sighs, talking to her friend while they head out of the kitchen. I assume they’ll be gone for a while. Within a few moments, only Gakupo and I are left in the kitchen. Alone. Oh jesus, this hasn’t calmed me down at all – I feel like I’m going to explode from embarrassment!

  I awkwardly rub at my arm, sneaking a glance over to Gakupo once I know Luka and Miku are upstairs. Within just a second, Gakupo’s eyes meet mine. I part my lips slightly, wanting to say something to him… But nothing comes out. What am I supposed to say to him? I don’t know if I should be pissed off at him for not telling me about Luka, or if I should be happy.

  Who am I kidding? It should be an easy decision. I should leave Gakupo to be with his true lover. So… why is it so hard to decide…?

  “Kaito-kun…” Gakupo speaks up after a long silence, in a low, almost irresistible tone. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Resist him, Kaito! Be reasonable!

  I gulp as I see him take a step towards me. Without really thinking, I take a step back – only to find myself bumping my back lightly against the kitchen counter. “Ah…” I lightly gasp, looking behind me, seeing that I’m indeed now cornered. Well, not literally, but it’s not like I can run away from him. I quickly turn my head back to look up at Gakupo, standing tall as always.

  “Are you nervous?”

  I let out a scoff, rolling my eyes at his question. I casually prop my arms onto the counter behind me, acting like I meant to step here. “You must be joking. What makes you think you have the right to continue talking to me? You have a girlfriend of three years!” I stare right into his eyes as I snap, my own glare piercing him.

  Gakupo lets out a long sigh in what sounds like frustration. “Well then, what do you want me to tell you, Kaito-kun?”

  I narrow my eyes at him, wondering what he means by that. His expression is as blank as it was before. He acts so serious around me, compared to when he’s with Luka. I don’t understand. “Isn’t it obvious? Why hide Luka-chan from me?”

  “Because she isn’t important.”

  I uncontrollably grit my teeth together at his nonchalant, yet staggeringly arrogant response. “How could you just say that about your own girlfriend? Someone you’ve been with for three years?” I try my best not to raise my voice, but I make it clear just how irritated I’m getting.

  Gakupo remains calm and casual, however. “It’s the truth. And your girlfriend isn’t important to you anymore, either. If she was, you wouldn’t have ended up in my bed.”

  “Lower your voice…!” I demandingly hiss, my cheeks flushing red at the mention of that. I clench my fists together, knowing I can’t fight with him. But what he’s saying can’t be true – it just can’t be! I love Miku with all my heart. Even before we started dating, I always considered her to be the only one who truly understood me.

  “Stop playing these games, Kaito-kun. I already know what I want. And it isn’t Luka-chan.”

  Could it be that… our relationship just grew stale…? She’s never been very suggestive nor seductive; always innocent, never kissed me for too long… I’ve never had those thoughts about Miku, though. I thought I was satisfied with the way things are between us.

  From the beginning, did I ever even feel a strong spark between us?

  I let out a quiet sigh, thinking back to the instant spark felt between Gakupo and I this morning. When he pressed his lips against mine in that enticing manner… I felt complete. But I can’t do this to Miku – can I? I’ve known Miku for so long. I know exactly what type of person she is. With Gakupo, it’s hard to tell where we’ll end up in a couple months.

  After yet another long silence, I take in a breath. “I…”

  “We’re back!~”

  Gakupo and I immediately jump away from each other at the sound of Miku’s voice. He takes a couple steps back, and I pull myself up from leaning against the counter. Just how long have we been talking? Luka and Miku are finished already…

  “Hey, Mi-chan,” I say, with a light smile. Although it’s completely forced at this point. We had just been interrupted so suddenly – there’s no way I’m over our conversation yet.

  “Did you miss me, Gaku-kun?” A teasing smirk pulls at Luka’s lips, as she walks towards her boyfriend. While the two begin to tease each other back and forth, I can’t help but slump against the counter again.

  I fold my arms over my chest, letting out a heavy sigh. Miku walks over to me, a concerned expression crossing her features. I hate seeing that look on her face. She doesn’t deserve any of this. “Don’t worry, Mi-chan. I’m still just a bit tired.”

  “Ah… I guess you didn’t sleep well last night,” Miku says, twirling on her heels to lean against the counter beside me.

  I lower my glance to the floor, my eyes slipping shut momentarily. “Well, I was so excited about our anniversary and all,” I reply, forcing out a laugh. I hope she doesn’t catch on that I’m lying. Maybe I’ll just end up looking exhausted, like I’m claiming to be. “We should go to fancy restaurants more often, though. The food is delicious.”

  Miku giggles, nodding in agreement. “I’d like that…” Perhaps I can take her out on one more wonderful date, before telling her the truth. Damn it, I don’t know.

  “Well, how about tomorrow night? You can spend some time with Luka-chan today without worrying about some deadline, and then we’ll have tomorrow all to ourselves.” It’s too late. Before I can stop myself, I’ve already said the words. I just set a deadline for myself. I only have until tomorrow night to decide whether or not I’ll tell her the truth.

**…**

  Miku and I ended up staying at Luka’s house for much longer than I wanted. It had only been about two hours more after lunch, but it ended up being painfully awkward. Gakupo and I hardly said a word to each other, which made it seem like we weren’t interested in being ‘friends’, in front of Luka and Miku. It’s for the best, anyway.

  Luka and Miku are currently chattering away at the front door, while Gakupo and I awkwardly stand together on the path outside. They’re not too far away from us, but they still probably can’t hear what we’re talking about. And so, I take this opportunity to speak to him some more. He stands there, arms neatly folded over his chest.

  “…I’m going to tell her the truth.”

  After spending some more time by Miku’s side, I’ve come to realise just how much I appreciate her. But also, I’ve realised it’s going to be incredibly difficult to keep this secret from her. I’ve completely fucked up my love life, but I can’t go back now.

  “The whole truth? And break up with her…?” Gakupo blinks at me, in a sort of blank manner. He doesn’t sound too impressed with my decision.

  “What other choice do I have?” I quietly groan, feeling exhausted. I’ve done too much thinking. “I’ve fucked everything up, Gakupo. I might as well just own up to it, take the ass-beating I deserve, and let her be with someone who won’t do this to her again.”

  “You aren’t thinking straight,” Gakupo simply says, before shaking his head slowly at me.

  I grit my teeth together in irritation, fed up of his blunt way of speaking. “Geez, do you have a better idea?” I challenge him, scowling. “I’m not asking you to tell your girlfriend the truth. I didn’t even say I wanted to continue seeing you.”

  “Ouch,” he remarks, sounding genuinely hurt by that. Okay, maybe that was too harsh.

  “It’s hurting me just as much,” I finally admit, giving a light sigh.

  “I think you’re being too hard on yourself,” Gakupo says, after a short pause. “Why don’t we just meet up in secret, rather than acting irrationally and screwing up our relationships?”

  “Implying that meeting in secret isn’t screwing them up enough?” I scoff at his absurd suggestion. “Look, I… just need time to think about this.”

  “At least come by my house tomorrow…” he suddenly requests, a suggestive sparkle in his eyes.

  “Do you really have the balls to ask me to come over and get f-”

  “To talk,” comes his interruption. Okay, yep. I misunderstood that one. He suddenly lowers his voice to a deep whisper, taking a subtle step closer to me. “But if I’m being honest… I can’t stop thinking about pinning you down and having you all to myself…”

  My eyes grow wide as I hear these words from Gakupo. In a split second, I can feel my cheeks beginning to burn; my heart begins to pound faster, too. “Wh-…wha… what…?” I stutter my words out, in disbelief. How can he say stuff like that so casually, damn it?!

  “Consider it.” He takes a step back, winking lightly at me, before turning around to look over at Luka and Miku. I don’t even have time to scream at him. “I’ll be off now, Lu-chan! See you tomorrow, my love!” He calls out, and waves over to his girlfriend.

  Luka glances over Miku’s shoulder, breaking out into a smile. “Okay, Gaku-kun! Bye-bye, darling!” She sends a wave back to him, her tone full of love. Once Gakupo begins to walk down the path some more, I see that Luka continues talking to Miku.

  I reach a hand up to lightly clutch at my forehead. Ugh, as _if_ I’m going over to Gakupo’s house tomorrow. I have more important things to do, like taking Miku out on a lovely date. Agh, damn it… But what Gakupo just said to me… I can’t stop thinking about this morning! This is bad, bad, bad! My mind is going crazy, and I’m trying to shut it up, but those inappropriate thoughts keep coming back. And before I know it, the idea of Gakupo _actually_ pinning me down and doing me hard sneaks into my mind.

  I clench my fists at my sides, a furious blush taking over my entire face. No, no! Stop it mind, shut up! As hot as Gakupo is, and as irresistible as he is, I must not break my date with Miku. Think logically, remember? I can’t meet up with him in secret. I can’t meet up with him at all. Forget about Gakupo. Forget…!

  Waahhh, this is terrible! It’s like I’m obsessed!

**…**

  I’m surprised that I feel so tired at the end of the day. As soon as my head hits the pillow, I’m overcome with a strong feeling of exhaustion. I groan lightly, rolling onto my side before letting out a soft yawn. Is it strange that my usually warm bed feels… empty? But I don’t feel like I want Miku beside me. I can’t get that sexy purple-haired Gakupo out of my mind. I’m torn between my girlfriend and him. I have no idea if I should take Miku on that date, or if I should go see Gakupo. I can’t do both.

  I let my eyes slip shut, rather than continuing to think. Just as I feel myself drifting off to sleep, I’m brought back to reality by a sudden memory. The events of last night no longer feel fuzzy; it doesn’t hurt my head to try and think about…

  _It was late. Maybe midnight, or sometime after that. Miku and I had been out all day celebrating our anniversary – we started by watching a movie, getting dinner at an amazing restaurant, and then we finished off by deciding to go into different bars. We only planned on drinking a little bit. However, Miku and I bumped into some old friends, and eventually, one drink turned into another, and so on._

_I was pretty out of it at that point, but not so much that I had no idea where I was. I knew what I was doing fairly well, actually. And there was no denying that I needed a long break from my girlfriend. Shit, one year was a hell of a long time. I didn’t think I was ready for such a huge commitment. It was all far too overwhelming. All my previous relationships – albeit just the two – ended in disaster due to my strange inability to commit._

_Tonight, the cycle would repeat itself again. I was a piece of shit, for sure. But I was honestly scared of the future. I was scared of ending up alone; scared that she’d lose interest in me. So, the only logical thing to do was to be the first to cheat, right? Wrong. But that’s what I did anyway._

_“I’m gonna go make some friends of my own, Mi-chan,” I said all of a sudden, standing up from my seat. I was surrounded by a bunch of Miku’s female friends, but weirdly enough, none of them were attractive to me. I wasn’t interested in any of them._

_“Fine, fine… You go do that,” Miku replied, not really caring all that much, since she had her own friends to keep her company._

_Perhaps I really did just want to make a friend that night. I didn’t know. I was looking for something fun to do. I wanted a new experience – no strings attached. I was always too scared to break Miku’s heart when I was sober, but now that the effects of the alcohol were kicking in, those fears melted away. Truth be told, I didn’t want to be in a relationship this long with one of my best friends. Along with my inability to commit, I also had a hard time finding someone who I really bonded with, on a level higher than just best friends._

_So, I figured, maybe women just didn’t do it for me. Maybe I was a closeted gay or something. I didn’t care on that night. And so, I approached a random table – one where a purple-haired, seemingly slightly older male was sat by himself. “Heya there.”_

_He raised a brow, glancing up from his phone to stare at me. I’d be uncomfortable if I was him, too. “Oh, uh… Hello. Aren’t you the one sitting with that group of loud girls over there?”_

_“Yup,” I nodded. “I dunno about you, but I can’t take all that crap for long.”_

_A smile crossed his features at this, and then he let out a soft chuckle. Damn, he was kind of cute. That soft laughter of his caused a faint, warm feeling within me – and that wasn’t a reaction to the alcohol. “I get what you mean. Take a seat.”_

_He gestured to the chair which faced opposite him, and I set myself down. He slid his phone into his pocket, and took a sip out of his glass. Compared to me, he seemed to be a bit more timid and not very lively. In fact, even mysterious. Maybe this was the one night of fun I needed to get my head back in the game. “So, what’s someone as handsome as you doing out here all by yourself? I figured you’d have been snapped up by some girl already.”_

_“Huh…? Someone as handsome as me?” he repeated, a mocking smirk pulling at his lips. “You aren’t hitting on me, are you?” Though I had no way of realising back then, that was his clever way of avoiding my question._

_I continued, giving a vague shrug. “Depends on whether you’re taken or not.”_

_“I must say, I don’t usually get many guys hitting on me in a pub,” he playfully remarked, propping his elbows up onto the table and leaning ever so slightly closer to me. “But I could get used to it, as long as they have short blue hair and an irresistible smile…”_

_I didn’t expect this to actually work. I thought he’d tell me to get lost, or even try to beat me up for trying to hit on him. But… holy shit. He was so hot, and I knew then and there, I wanted him badly. I didn’t even know why I was suddenly so eager to have sex. Even though I wasn’t faithful in the past, I never cheated on a girl by having sex with someone else. The most I did was kiss. But I could tell… He was different._

_“My name’s Gakupo, by the way – thanks for asking.” He teased me again, a devilish grin plastered across his face._

_“How rude of me,” I said, letting out a laugh. “I’m Kaito.”_

_“Well, Kaito-kun. It’s very nice to meet you.”_

_I casually leaned back in my chair. “Gakupo, I’m going to be honest here. I’m bored out of my mind in this pub, and I doubt my girlfriend would give a damn if I was suddenly missing. So, how about we skip the introductions, and go to your place for an unforgettable night?” I was stunned at the words coming out of my mouth. Drunk me really is smooth. Or perhaps an idiot._

_No. A smooth idiot._

_Gakupo stared at me for a few moments, before he burst out into laughter. “Oh, so you’re the straightforward type. Hmm… You have one chance to convince me to take you home.”_

_I paused for a moment, wondering exactly what I’d do to him. Maybe I’d just go with the flow and try whatever I can to make him feel good? Now, how exactly do I keep him from finding out I’m a virgin? I didn’t want to ruin the night or anything. When in doubt, lie. Act like you know what you’re doing. “I’ll definitely make it worthwhile… and I can’t go ruining the surprise, can I?” I innocently smiled._

_“Eh… I have nothing else better to do,” Gakupo said, giving a shrug, before standing up. “I would have gone with you, no matter what you said, by the way. This is the most exciting thing to happen to me in months.”_

_The rest was kind of self-explanatory. I was in the most confident mood, and surprisingly, I really did end up pleasing Gakupo. I practically jumped on him, smothering him with hot kisses; playfully biting his neck, sucking and licking every inch of his skin… and most importantly, giving him amazing pleasure down below. It was one of the biggest regrets of my life thus far – yet it was also one of the best things I’ve ever done._

  I wake up the next morning, unable to remember any of the dreams I had during the night. I’m glad I don’t remember, but I bet they involved Gakupo. Once I’m fully awake, and aware of my surroundings, I’m hit with that same memory from last night. I’m able to remember practically everything I did when I got drunk.

  I let out a soft sigh, sitting up in bed. In the end, I did all that because I’m a selfish moron. I care deeply for Miku, but maybe just as a best friend. Even so, what the hell was I thinking? I can’t keep up a relationship with her, can I? But even if I dumped her and started seeing Gakupo secretly, what if the cycle repeats itself… and I end up hurting Gakupo in the future? I’m so fucked up.

  But something is telling me to trust myself. It’s as though something is telling me, ‘everything will be okay with him’ – like a gut feeling. I admit, I felt that way when I first started dating Miku… But this time feels different. Maybe this time, I should trust that feeling. If it ends in disaster, this will be the last time I trust myself. I’ll have to leave the dating scene entirely if I fuck everything up with Gakupo.

  I reach over to my bedside table, taking hold of my phone. Now, do I be a coward and just text him? Or man the fuck up and call him? I stare idly at the screen for a short while, feeling nerves bubble up inside me. I take in a deep breath and decide to call him.

  After a painfully long time of waiting – which is really only a few seconds – I can hear Gakupo’s voice. “Mmmh…” Well, a yawn. “Hello?”

  I can’t help but smile softly as I hear him. “…is it weird that I missed your voice already?” I shyly speak up, a light blush staining my cheeks.

  “Kaito-kun…! Hey, it’s so good to hear from you.” He sounds rather excited, which I find kind of surprising, but mostly sweet. Just hearing his voice is enough to make me feel less nervous. “I take it you’ve had plenty of time to think?”

  I slowly nod to myself. “You’re right… I didn’t want to admit it to you, or myself. You see, long story short, I’ve never been great at commitment.”

  “Oh…” comes his quiet mumble in response. Naturally, he sounds disappointed. But I’ve yet to continue.

  “But…” I can’t believe I’m blushing so much now. It’s like I’m making a love confession or something. “When I think about you… The future seems a little less scary. Something is telling me to trust myself – telling me that you might be the one I’ve been waiting for all along.”

  “Kaito-kun… Stop talking, and get your ass over here right now,” Gakupo demands, in a serious tone. I understand why he’s saying that. Maybe I’m being a little too deep over the phone. “You remember how to get here, right?”

  Huh. I think I do. “Yeah, it’s no problem,” I say this anyway. I guess this is my decision in the end. But I have no desire to let Miku know just yet – I want to see Gakupo right away.

  “And for the record… I feel the same way.” After he says this, he ends the call. Abrupt? Totally. Do I care? Hell no.

**…**

  It takes quite some time for me to get to Gakupo’s house. I couldn’t remember the exact bus that passes his house – eventually, after asking a few random people outside, I find my way there. Once I approach his front door, I find myself frozen on the spot with nerves. Really, after all that’s happened?

  I mentally slap myself, in order to pull myself together. I lift my hand up and knock firmly on the door. When the door swings open, I’m greeted by none other than Gakupo. He’s even more breath-taking up close… I’m left speechless, in awe.

  “Took you long enough to get here,” Gakupo says as a greeting, laughing playfully at me.

  For some reason, I’m seeing Gakupo completely differently… His smile, his laughter – everything about him makes me feel warm and weak all over. I don’t want to be irrational, but am I falling for him so soon? Even so, there’s still Luka. “Yeah… I want to talk first, though.”

  Gakupo gives an understanding nod, and steps aside to let me enter. I take a step inside, curiously glancing around his house for a few moments while he closes the door. I don’t remember what the place looks like at all. Then again, that’s maybe because it was pitch black when we entered last night – oh, and maybe because we went straight to his bedroom.

  “Come, we’ll go into the living room.” Gakupo speaks in a sort of serious tone again, and he leads me through his house until we reach his living room. I raise a brow as I glance around the area. It’s surprisingly fancy, yet cosy. There’s dark, warm colours adorning the area, along with undoubtedly top-of-the-range furniture, and even an electric fire set on the wall. Without a doubt, Gakupo must have one hell of a good job.

  I don’t stare at my surroundings for too long, of course. I simply follow after Gakupo, sitting myself down beside him on the comfy couch. He makes himself comfortable, leaning back against the cushions, while I sit there a bit awkwardly. “Well, I’ll just cut to the chase, should I? Uh… what I said over the phone was all true.”

  “Yeah, I figured that,” he responds, with a light laugh. He tilts his head to the side, our eyes meeting. “But… why do I get the feeling you’re still not satisfied?”

  I rub at the back of my neck with a sigh, leaning back slightly on the couch. “It’s not your fault. Like I said, I have a hard time with commitment. It’s part of the reason I essentially jumped on you that night.”

  “Right,” he says, giving a nod. He seems to be understanding so far. “But…?”

  “But, you know, I feel different around you,” I respond, in a sincere tone. “Heh, I get it if you don’t really believe me… I really do feel like that night was meant to be, though. Call me incredibly cheesy, but… It’s as though I’m attracted to you, just like a magnet. Our relationship would surely be frowned upon; seen as forbidden. Yet, I don’t care what happens, as long as I can be by your side.”

  I can see a light blush rise to Gakupo’s cheeks. I don’t know where the hell that line came from, but hell, it works. Apparently, I’m smooth when I’m sober, too. “I feel the same way, Kaito-kun,” he says, after a short pause. “After three years with Luka-chan… Ugh. The spark in that relationship has been gone for a long time. She’s not important to me anymore – I just haven’t broken up with her, for her own sake.”

  “So, what will we do…?” I quietly wonder, slowly pulling my eyes from his. This is what I’m worried the most about.

  “Hey, don’t look like that…” Gakupo shuffles along to move closer, and before I know it, his thumb and forefinger have tilted my chin up. Our eyes meet once again, and there’s the sweetest look on his face… And his glance makes me feel safe. “I can probably guess what you’re thinking. And you don’t need to worry at all. I won’t be falling back in love with Luka-chan any time soon, especially now that you’re in my life.”

  “It’s probably best to keep things under wraps for now, right…?” I hesitantly continue, and for some reason, I can feel my eyes stinging just a bit. I’m becoming selfish and jealous already. I’m a fool. When I see Gakupo slowly nod, I can’t help but bite down on my lower lip. “I get it. It would be too sudden to break it to them.”

  “Indeed, it would… But I’ll make sure we get plenty of time together,” he says, in a tone that I can’t help but believe straight away. He moves his grip from my chin, and softly traces his fingers across to caress my cheek. “So, like a magnet, huh…?”

  I laugh nervously at that. “Y-Yeah, I have no idea what that was all about, I…”

  “I like it.” He simply says this, with a smile. “Well then, Kaito-kun. Looks like you’re all mine now.”

  After chewing on my lower lip for a few moments, while Gakupo speaks to me… I find that I can’t hold back any longer. I lower my eyes to look at his slightly parted lips, then trail my glance back up to meet his eyes. Just like giving him a hint.

  Even though I’m too shy to make a move at the moment, Gakupo seems to have picked up on it easily. With his hand still gently placed against my cheek, he leans closer to me, his eyes slipping shut. I take in a light breath to prepare myself, allowing my eyes to close along with him. And before I know it, I’m met with the most blissful feeling of his sweet lips on top of mine. My heart is pounding in my chest, and there are some tears welling up in my eyes… But I finally know this is right.

  And that kiss seals our promise to stay together, no matter how forbidden our relationship may be.

**…**


End file.
